Daily Stretch # 5: Expand Your Window of Tolerance

Helping those we love seems natural (and easy). That’s what friends and family are for: to help each other, right?

But what about those we don’t like? Helping someone we “hate” that requires to truly stretch beyond our comfort zone.

We don’t like those who hurt us. We don’t get along with people who disagree with our beliefs and values. We dislike those who get under our skin.

We believe that we are better than other people. That’s the biggest truth of why we don’t like others.

Today’s Stretch: Expand Your Window of Tolerance

It’s hard to get along with everyone. I’m not telling you to become best friend of someone you dislike. I simply want you to challenge your current tolerance level. Just a small stretch.

“Tolerance implies no lack of commitment to one’s own beliefs. Rather it condemns the oppression or persecution of others.” — John F. Kennedy

Our emotions filter how we see people.

Hate casts a shadow over our relationships. We hate those who hate us and vice versa.

Put your emotions aside for a day or so. Empathize with their uniqueness and vulnerability.

Today’s stretch: help someone you don’t like. They need help. Try to walk in their shoes. Ask how they feel. Understand what they are going through. Give them a hand.

Discover the pleasure of being more tolerant.

Don’t Get Caught By These Excuses

“She won’t accept my help.”

“After all he’s done to me, how can I help him? I never forget those who hurt me.”

“There are so many good people that need my help, why waste my energy and time in someone that I hate?”

Stretch, Reflect & Grow

Use these questions to reflect once you’ve practiced this new stretch.

• Why did you dislike that person in particular?
• How do you deal with tolerance?
• Were you able to reframe the image you have about this person?
• How did you feel before and after you helped a person you disliked? What changed? Why?